my open letter to the producers of american idol following last night's 2-hour finale.

dear AI producers,

let me just say that i'm glad you guys picked america voted jordin sparks as the winner. i love blake lewis, but let's face it, they're both winners at this point, so it doesn't matter anyway. clive davis probably already has both of their mega-produced albums all planned out already.

i was happy to see melinda dolittle perform with the winans (not to be confused with the wayans). and the boy and girl medleys were cute. and thank goodness that you got permission to sing beatles songs. now if you could only get michael jackson to approve his catalogue, you'll be all set.

i will say this though, WTF!?!?!?! my DVR cut off before you got anywhere close to announcing the winner. i was still watching the end of some blake and jordin performance or some crap. and while it was fun to bring back the bush baby and his friend, were that many golden statues really necessary? you're not the oscars. you're not the emmys (in fact, you turned down to produce the emmys this year to focus on idol). remember the whole point of this two hour finale? so we can reveal the winner??!?! thanks to your show running long, my dvr cut off and i had to watch some news program recap it in 30 seconds (which to be honest, is all i should've watched anyway).

watching past idols was fun. but this year's show was a snoozefest compared to last year (clay aiken and his superfan, crying hasselhoff, mother f**king PRINCE!). although you did bring back the crying girl (and sanjaya) and a sentimental jerry springer, it just wasn't the same. and as for the non-past idol winner performers, it just showed me how much smokey robinson, gladys knight, and tony bennett have aged. and way to try and up the "cool factor" by bringing in green day. *sidenote: really green day? american idol? i expect better from you. and sanjaya and joe perry? music might as well be dead.

i'm glad jordin took the crown, but you let me down. actually, i'm glad you're not producing the emmys. just focus on what you do best: going city to city in search of the next superstar (i.e. just slightly better than karaoke singer).

xoxo

p.s. i TOTES picked jordin as the winner.

p.p.s. i'm glad i watched lost over your finale. at least my dvr didn't cut THAT off. that show was effin' AWESOME.